By 
If every reality show needs a villain, then Siesta Key’s most eligible antagonist is also its most reluctant. Styling herself as the show’s alpha female, 22-year-old Chloe Trautman’s been at the center of controversy since the very first episode, which ended with her nose being smashed and her friendship with Amanda completely destroyed. It only got more dramatic from there, with Chloe spilling secrets, telling harsh truths, and allowing her relationships with "best friend" and recently revealed chief tormentor, Alex, to seemingly take over her life. For Chloe, it hasn’t been an easy season. And she knows it.
But let me tell you this: If Chloe Trautman’s “bad,” then perhaps it really is because she’s been edited that way. Or maybe it’s because she’s been taking her therapy — which she began attending despite wanting nothing less than to scour the darkest corners of her psyche — seriously. Because the Chloe I spoke to on a recent Friday afternoon was someone markedly different than the person we see on our TV sets ever Monday night. Positive, open, and, most surprisingly (at least when it comes to reality stars), willing to take responsibility for her past actions. Chloe’s been working on changing her attitude, shifting how she treats others, and reflecting on how she lets others treat her.
Over the course of a "quick 15-minute interview" that took the better part of an hour, Chloe talked about everything, answering difficult questions about her anger issues and the infamous fight that led to her broken nose, revealing the way she’s been shamed about her body by other cast members, and speaking openly about how time and therapy have helped her grow.
And I’ve got to be honest: As someone who’s been fiercely critical of Chloe since she first bounded onto our screens to let us know that she’s not to be messed with, I can’t help but consider myself a fan.
How have you been adjusting to being on TV?
It was interesting at first. I think it's no secret that I'm the reality-TV guru of the group. I've watched every show known to man on Bravo, E!, and MTV. I was super excited and into it, and I was probably one of the most natural at first. Once you get to know the crew they become family, so it’s just like hanging out with people you love.
Going to therapy on the show was something I was super against. Me and my producer would argue so much about it. She was seeing the bigger picture on how people were going to relate to me, and I was against it because you know therapy — they really get into like the dark details of your life. I was really nervous to share that.
A moment that really stood out for me was in the second episode when you and your mother discussed your anger issues. She got really real with you on television. What was that like?
It's always been my mom and I my whole life, so we have a very interesting relationship. She's sometimes more my friend than my mom; and my father situation is not something we talk about. When I was growing I understood he's not really a good guy, he didn't want to be in my life. To have to re-talk about it on camera was really difficult for me. It’s one of the first things I filmed.
Obviously we were going to dinner to discuss these things. I said to my mom, "Don't go to into detail with my dad situation cause I'm not ready to go there yet." My mom doesn't really care whether there's camera's around her or not, though. My mom is a very real person. She's an angel that walks this earth, but she is very honest and real. That’s maybe where I get it from. I know It seems like I'm getting upset with my mom, but I was just really nervous to talk about it on camera.
I didn't know everybody. The cameramen, the sound men, the producers, the directors — I didn't know them well and I felt like I was opening up such a raw, sensitive subject for the world when I wasn't ready to.
It almost seemed like a cry for help — like if you didn't listen to your mom in that moment her hope was that you might when you were watching that moment air.
My mom, she’s always right, but I never want to admit it. And I knew I needed to talk to someone. There’s something we all chose not to put on these show, just because it is very personal: My grandma passed away the first day of filming.
She lived to be almost 90. She lived a beautiful healthy life. We decided not to show that because she was very sick in the end and wasn't able to talk. I was raised by my mom and my grandma and I talk about that a lot. I was going through the loss of my grandma and dealing with these anger issues.
That incident that went down with Amanda — it was horrible. My mom was like, "you’ve never been in a fight, what is going on with you? I really feel like you need to talk to somebody." I chose to go even though I was very stubborn about it for a very long time. I didn’t want to go at all. I'm really happy I did, and I'm really happy I chose to share it with the world.
Can we talk about the Amanda fight? The gossip around Sarasota — people email me — is that you got into a fight over who the Uber was going to drop off first.
Pretty much. We had been at Alex's party all day long, and what you don't see is that I just flew back into town from my grandma's funeral, so I was very emotional. And we’re always drinking a lot at Alex’s parties. We were drinking very heavily.
We’re never going to agree on the story — that’s why I don't really like to go into detail — but we were just arguing and then it turned into "Ever since the show started you're not the same person." The words that I said were not okay and it pushed her to grab my face and then I kicked her, and then obviously you saw the result of me kicking her. It was really bad, for a really long time. I’m really glad it's over.
It makes more sense now why you apologized to her. The way it was shown felt like this altercation was a pattern for you. Because who gets their nose broken and then apologizes to the person who broke it?
I think that's part of the reason my mom really wanted me to go to therapy. She knows my mouth, how it can get me into trouble. Obviously, nothing I said to Amanda will ever justify what she did — and she knows that and she feels extremely bad for that — but at the end of the day, if I wouldn't have said those things, and pushed her to that limit, none of this would have happened.
Me going to therapy is not really about me being physically angry, it's about how when I feel backed into a corner, my words lash out, and of course you always lash out at the people you love most.
What is your endgame with Alex? On the show, it’s clear that you're in love with him even though you say he’s your best friend.
You really think I'm in love with him?
Absolutely. I 100% think that you're in love with him.
Oh my God, that is so funny!
I’m not the only one who thinks that.
No, I definitely agree you're not the only one who thinks that. Honestly, Alex is my best friend. I don't view him that way. He's slept with every single of my friends so obviously at some point in time, if I wanted to sleep with him, I could have.
We just don't have that relationship. Our relationship has kinda just always been this brother-sister vibe. When I need advice I go to him. On the show, you see me talking to him about all the girls, but that's not all Alex and I talk about. For instance, I got in a car accident a while ago and I was dealing with that and he's the first person I called to talk to about it because of his dad's business and him going to law school. He’s honestly like a big brother to me and I know all his dirty little tactics.
I really don't like that people think that's the kind of guy that I want in life. I think Alex has 10-plus years of growing before he can even settle down with a girl, and I obviously don't want to wait.
He's my best friend and I wish him the best, but you know doing this show with him has opened my eyes. If I want to grow in life and become the best self that I can be, maybe keeping Alex so close to me isn't what's best for me. You’ll see our relationship change even more during the rest of the season.
On the last episode, when you broke up with him, it really looked like a breakup on your end.
Yeah.
One of the things that I didn’t really understand was the "big dinner" joke in Bimini. You said it was about your weight, but it felt like a really bad sex joke, and then on the next episode you revealed that Alex and Paulie Paul have been saying these terrible things to you about your body. Can you talk to me about that?
Alex and I have had a very long friendship and Paulie has been there the whole time, so they've obviously seen me in my prime, when I was 19 and like 105 pounds, working out every day — if not more than once a day — and eating nothing but broccoli and chicken.
I had a really awesome banging body at one point and, as I've gotten older, my metabolism has changed and I hate to put the blame on this, but my grandma passing has been very hard on me. I've gained weight very fast, and so it may not seem like he’s making fun of that, but he's made fun of it so many times when cameras haven't been around that they finally caught it on camera.
Every single person in that kitchen knew he was making fun of me. And we knew he was making a fat joke even if it doesn't seem like that. Alex saying "a big dinner" is basically him looking at me and saying "You don't need to eat," which is horrible.
That's so fucked up, Chloe.
I know. Trust me, I know. What you don't see throughout that entire trip is that Paul would take Snapchat videos of me eating and put it in slow motion. The show was not out, so we didn't have a lot of people on Snapchat and only our close friends saw it but…
Alex thinks that Paul is hard on me because he’s jealous over Alex’s and my friendship. And I don't know why Alex does it. It doesn't make sense to me, quite frankly. What sucks is I still feel like Alex and Paul haven’t learned their lesson, which is sad.
The fact that you possibly believe that I could be in love with someone that makes fun of the one thing that hurts me the most on TV…That right there should let you know that I don't view him that way.
It was definitely a wake-up call for our friendship. Honestly, him making fun of me for my weight hasn't made me want to go to the gym and work out and eat right. It makes me want to go in a dark room and stuff my face with a pizza. It sucks, but that's the truth. The last person on earth that should ever make fun of your weight is your closest guy friend.
You know Alex — he’s a womanizer, he gets every good-looking girl possible, and he basically started to make me feel I was not good enough to hang out with him. When we're at the Tiki Bar it seems like a break up, but it's really me getting somebody that has made fun of my weight out of my life because it really hurt. And the fact that I know it’s on national television? It really fucking hurts.
Do you regret being on the show?
Not in the least bit.
Ok, I have to ask: Kelsey and Alex totally hooked up at that party, right?
Yeah. In my opinion.
In your opinion.
Not in my opinion. From what Alex has told me — yes. I feel like when your stories change so many times — like every day — you’re lying. Kelsey's story started with ‘nothing happened,’ then it started with, ‘okay I did go up into his room,’ and then it turned into, ‘Okay I did go up to his room to change.’ I've never heard of a girl going up into Alex's room after everybody's been partying all day and night. I like to quote Juliette: “It wasn't to play checkers."
What’s something that we don’t know about you that you wish we did?
It doesn’t get touched on a lot in the season, but I’m finishing up cosmetology school. I love it. I'm really big into makeup. You don't see it, but I do all the girls’ makeup, all the girls’ hair, all the time. I would love to be a traveling makeup artist for a modeling company or for somebody personally.
We all went to the VMAs. Madisson, I love her to death, but she doesn't do her makeup or her hair a lot and she asked me if I would do her hair and makeup, and she was so sweet about it. That was really cool. I got to do her full makeup for the VMAs and she got so many comments about how she looked so beautiful and it just assured me that this is my passion.
I'm going to be real with you: Watching you on Siesta Key and talking to you one-on-one is a very different experience. You’re such a nice, genuine person. It’s a shame we don’t see that so much on the show.
Yeah. I think my response to that would be to learn to surround yourself [with people] that bring out the best in you. And if you’re going to continue to surround yourself with people that bring out the worst in you, then, at some point, it’s not their fault — it’s yours.
This interview has been edited and condensed.
